Have you ever wondered why you prefer quiet nights over crowded parties? Or why socialising drains your energy but solitude feels refreshing? If so, you might be an introvert. But what exactly does being an introvert mean, and how can you tell if you are one?
In this post, you’ll discover what the key signs of introversion are to help you understand yourself better. And if you are an introvert, welcome to the club! You should grab our free Guide for Introverts!
What is an Introvert?
To figure out if you are an introvert, you first have to know what an introvert is.
To put it simply, an introvert is someone who may seem more reserved or quiet, but the truth is they simply like being inside their own head and feel more energised when they spend time alone in a calm environment.
An extrovert, however, is on the opposite end of the scale. They’re often loud and expressive, and they definitely are not afraid to be the centre of attention socially. In fact, they thrive in busy and exciting environments and feel more energised from them.
4 Types of Introverts
There isn’t just one type of introvert—nope, there’s 4 of them! And whilst the definition of an introvert remains the same, these types each have their own unique characteristics that help narrow down which type of introvert you are.
Social Introvert
Even though you prefer your alone time, if you don’t mind going to social gatherings (as long as they’re small), you’re likely a social introvert. There are times when you’re more than happy to spread your social butterfly wings as long as you can come back to your own space to recharge.
Social introverts are usually selective about who they spend their time with but they’re not necessarily shy or awkward around other people. In fact, once a conversation gets going, they’re often enthusiastic to talk about their interests or topics that matter to them. But they definitely don’t enjoy small talk.
And once the socialising is over, it’s back to our books, our own thoughts, and our own space! Despite being social as and when it suits us, social introverts still get the label for being shy or antisocial. But, come on, this is us trying. We need the balance between socialising and alone time.
Thinking Introvert
A lot of introverts spend time lost in their own thoughts, but if you’re particularly imaginative or away with the fairies, you’re more than likely a thinking introvert.
Thinking introverts are called so because of their deep thinking, their independence, and their attention to detail. They are dreamers but they are also logical, fuelled by curiosity, empathy, and their intellectual abilities. But they don’t just think, they listen and they tend to spot things that others miss.
A thinking introvert is the epitome of ‘think before you speak’ but their thinking can also lead to overthinking and more anxiety. If you’re a thinking introvert, you may overthink little details or make a problem bigger in your head than what it really is. Despite this, you’re pretty good at trusting your own judgement and solving problems on your own.
Anxious Introvert
Anxious introverts are not like their social counterparts. They try to avoid social interactions all together for fear of being judged, making mistakes, or simply feeling embarrassed. They tend to have high awareness which makes them feel self-conscious and nervous, especially in large groups and in busy, fast-paced environments.
As sensitive souls, anxious introverts cope better with things that are familiar to them and they actively seek out quiet, calm spaces for them to recharge. If you’re an anxious introvert, you likely find that your energy is easily drained by interaction and that you have a hard time saying how you feel.
But being an anxious introvert isn’t all bad—your deep awareness of the world makes you compassionate and empathetic. And when you make connections, they are meaningful and strong.
Restrained Introvert
A restrained introvert holds their cards close to their chest. They are often guarded and take time to open up to people because of their cautious nature. It’s not that they don’t want to get to know someone, they just take longer to feel comfortable.
If you have a hard time saying how you feel or are very mindful of the decisions you make, you might be a restrained introvert. Blending into the background doesn’t bother you so much—in fact, you’re happy to watch from a distance and make your own observations. You feel more confident when you analyse the space, take it all in, and organise your thoughts before having to interact or make a decision.
Restrained introverts might be perceived as emotionless or even unfriendly at times but, as their name implies, they feel restrained to be themselves until they realise they can be.
20 Signs You’re a True Introvert
1. You enjoy being alone
Being alone is in no way shape or form a negative for you. In fact, you welcome solitude with open arms! It’s not just the chance to have some ‘me time,’ it’s the chance to recharge your social batteries and do the quiet things that you enjoy in your own comfortable space.
2. You feel drained after socialising
If after any form of interaction or heavy socialising you feel that your energy has been diminished and left you exhausted, you’re likely an introvert. And whether you enjoyed the social interaction or not, you can’t wait to get home and top up on some alone time.
3. Small talk doesn’t cut it, you need something deeper
You’d pick a long meaningful conversation over small talk any day. Let’s face it, introverts actually like to talk, but it’s got to mean something. Give us ideas, emotions, and personal stories to talk about. If you’d much prefer that over surface-level chitchat, welcome to the introverted club.
4. You avoid crowded, noisy places
If crowded, noisy places make you feel the same way I do—on edge, uncomfortable and overwhelmed—take a seat on the introvert throne! You go back to your quiet, cosy corner. It’s better there.
5. You’re always in your own head
Put your hand up if all you ever hear is your own thoughts. Put your hand higher if your head is always stuck in the clouds? You might not always enjoy your inner monologue, especially if it makes you overthink (even things from years ago!), but at least it’s always there for you. And it’s a place to escape to.
6. Your friendship group is small
You might have a small circle of friends but that’s completely fine by you. Quality over quantity is the motto, after all. You much prefer your deeper connections over having too many friends to even count.
7. You’d rather not be the centre of attention
Even when it comes to birthdays or simply being asked a question in front of a whole group of people, you dread the thought of being the centre of attention (and try to avoid it at all costs!) Keep the spotlight away—we don’t need it, thank you.
8. Writing something is a lot more appealing than speaking it
The thought of writing something to communicate rather than speaking it is a lot more appealing to you, and you actually find it easier. You might be someone who easily trips over their words or just can’t get them out, but with a pen and paper everything just flows.
9. You get called ‘shy’ or told to ‘talk more’
Whilst you’re probably not shy (and even if you are, that’s okay!), you get called it All. The. Time. People mistake your quietness for shyness, but hey—you’re just introverted! And I bet you’d love to tell people to ‘talk less’ when they tell you to ‘talk more.’
10. You’re sensitive
It’s difficult for you to take things lightly. If someone says something, it usually goes to your heart. But being a sensitive soul also means you have a lot of empathy for people and that’s an invaluable attribute.
11. You can focus really well and for a long time
Introverts have a natural ability to concentrate for long periods of time. It’s why you probably enjoy time-consuming hobbies or doing things which involve a great deal of focus, patience, and creativity. Let’s just say, you rarely bounce off the walls.
12. You see the small things that are easily missed
Have you noticed that you have great (perhaps even exceptional) attention to detail? Well, that’s definitely an introverted trait. Because you take everything in and are very observant, you often spot things that others miss. You likely pick up on things quite easily and notice how people are really feeling. And when you notice the small things, your sensitive and empathetic side are brought right to the surface.
13. You’re not just an observe, you’re a people watcher
I mean, who doesn’t love people watching? Yes, I think introverts definitely do it more—and enjoy it. We’re always watching from a distance. And no it’s not creepy—it helps us figure people out.
14. You prefer to work alone than with other people
Am I right in saying that if you got the choice to either work alone or work with a group of people you’d pick the former? It’s not that you wouldn’t work with other people, you just prefer to do things on your own. There’s no stifling your independence.
15. Phone calls can be the bane of your existence
The dreaded phone call. Most of the time you just can’t face it. When you hear that ringtone and see that caller ID flash up, you have to all but pretend that you just can’t get to it or are too busy. (In reality, you’re sitting watching Netflix.) And don’t get us started on having to make appointments over the phone—it’s often bad enough talking to someone you actually know.
16. You’re selective about when you socialise
It has to be on your terms and you have to feel up for it—am I right? If plans are sprung on you out of the blue, you tend to retreat. That’s because you like to know when things are happening and where so that you can be selective about it. There’s times when you’re more than happy to socialise and times when
17. You take time to come out of your shell
Are you picturing a tortoise like I am? It’s not just a metaphor—introverts do indeed take time to come out of their shells. But when we’re out, people will know about it.
18. Thinking before you speak is second nature
Before you say something, do you nearly always think about what you’re going to say? Thinking before speaking is like second nature to introverts. We like to analyse what someone has said and think about our response before the words leave our mouths. After all, words aren’t just words to us.
19. You’re a good listener
Listening is like your superpower. You can’t do anything without using it. In fact, you need to listen to be able to process things. So, when someone else is taking centre stage and keeping the conversation afloat, you’re more than happy to sit back and take it all in. And when it is your turn to speak, the other person is grateful to have been heard and in return receive your words of wisdom.
20. Lazy or rainy days are like heaven
If lazy or rainy days sound like your idea of heaven and you prefer them over days packed with things to do, I will take bets that you’re an introvert. I mean, who can resist duvet days, snacks, books, and Netflix?
In the Middle? You’re an Ambivert!
Not everyone fits perfectly into one category. If you’re someone that has some of these traits but also the traits of an extrovert, you’re somewhere in the middle. That makes you an ambivert!
Understanding your personality will help you to embrace your strengths, introvert or not.
Just remember, being an introvert is not a flaw—it’s who you are! Introverts bring depth, thoughtfulness, and creativity to the world. Isn’t that nice!
Are you an introvert? Share your thoughts in the comments!
